5 Things to Know Before You Send Funeral Flowers
5 Things to Know Before You Send Funeral Flowers
When a friend, relative, coworker, or acquaintance dies, it is common to send the family a gift of funeral flowers (also known as condolence flowers or sympathy flowers). Thanks to online ordering options, you can do this in a few minutes and with just a few clicks of the mouse.
Before you press send, however, there are a few things you want to bear in mind.
1. Is there a funeral?
The most common place to send condolence flowers is directly to the funeral home just prior to the funeral or memorial service taking place. This way, the florist and the funeral director can work together to ensure the flowers are arranged and set up for display during the service. If there is no funeral being held, you may want to reconsider your gift. Although you can send flowers directly to the family, this is a less common practice. You might want to consider something more practical (like a gift basket) instead.
2. Does the family request an in lieu of donation?
Rather than ask people to spend their money on funeral flowers, some people would rather have those funds channeled toward a charity that was important to the deceased. Even though you might want to send a more traditional gift like flowers, it is best to respect the wishes of the family, especially if they request it in the obituary.
3. Are there cultural/religious restrictions to sending funeral flowers?
In the Jewish faith, funeral flowers are generally frowned upon, but food is appropriate. Sympathy gifts are uncommon in Hindu and Buddhist faiths, but they are sometimes sent anyway. Every culture and religion has its own ritual and traditions—and even these vary by location, by sect, and by community. Before you purchase any funeral flowers, discuss the gift with the funeral director or a religious leader in that faith. They may be able to direct you to a more appropriate choice.
4. Who do you plan to send the sympathy flowers to?
The most common recipient of condolence flowers is the immediate family to the deceased (spouse, children, parents), but this does not have to be the case. Although you will most likely be sending the flowers to the funeral home (and therefore to the family member responsible for paying for and planning the funeral), you can also send bouquets to anyone who may be mourning or need cheering up.
5. How long has it been since death occurred?
In most cases, sympathy flowers are sent within ten days of death occurring—especially if you are sending the display directly to the funeral home. However, there is no time limit on grief. For many people, the first few weeks surrounding a loss are an overwhelming time, without many chances to sit and truly mourn. Funeral flowers may go overlooked during this time, or they may be part of an onslaught of bouquets that are difficult to keep track of. You may want to consider sending your gift on a holiday or anniversary instead, as these are times when grief will often escalate.
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